Is He Worth It?

I've always heard the saying "It's cheaper to keep her," but I wonder does the same apply to women with their men? The ratio of women to men is something like 7 to 1. So men have options, for women, not so much. In the Black community especially, our men are either locked up, gay, or on the DL. If that isn't the case, they are dating outside the race, married, or just full of bullshit. Needless to say, our women are desperate to find and keep a man, but are they doing that at the expense of themselves? I see or hear countless stories of women who are with men that make them unhappy, and constantly disappoint them; these men can even beat them or cheat on them and they refuse to leave. These same women will be the first ones to fight another woman over the same man they call a dog and beg him to stay after he's caught stepping out, they will even subject themselves to additional  hurt and humiliation to make sure he stays and doesn't leave. So what makes them (us) stay? Are we so fearful of being alone that we are willing to settle for the guy who doesn't care, love or respect us. Or are we that insecure in our essence and power as women that we are willing to allow a man to demean the Queens that we are? I have been in this situation many times mentally and at the end of the day, it isn't worth it; the wondering about where he is, or who he is with only serves to destroy the person I am. In the end, I'm the one sitting here looking crazy and low key psychotic while he's running around doing what makes him happy and having his proverbial cake and ice cream. Instead of sitting here settling for men who don't mean us any good and who can't or won't love and respect us, we should be less willing to settle and more demanding of a good man. Think about it, if we aren't doing our job as the woman, he has no problem with upgrading to a better model; shouldn't we do the same?