Is Chivalry Really Dead?

Let me first say that I am a strong black woman in training. I say training, because every day is a new experience full of lessons, hurts and surprises both good and bad. The other day a friend posed the question of what happened to all the good Black men; theyre either all dogs, lazy, locked up of fucked up. Sometimes I wonder this too, and I think to myself what happened to chivalry and the men that wanted to cater to a woman's heart and fulfill her dreams. Personally, I think the "Independent Black Woman" movement didn't really kill chivalry, because it is still alive and well, but we helped beat it into early submission. The Black woman today seems to be so focused on being defined as an equal and seen as a force to be reckoned with, that we have forgotten how to be women. We are so determined to be hard and strong, that we have forgotten how to be gentle and soft. We've traded curves and lace, for angles and suits, where did this change come from and how to we bring back the essence of who we are and balance that with who we want to be. Let me be the first to say that I want to be that woman that walks in a room and power is my perfume; I also want to be that woman that conquers her man with a quiet love. I want to rock heels in the boardroom as well as in the kitchen. I want to be that woman that caters to her man first and foremost because he is my king, but I want to handle my business at the same time. Yes, we will find our share of the so called "dogs" but we don't have to rescue them and give them a bath. There are men out there that want to find us and cater to the softness, curves and lace, but he won't find us if we are too busy being focused on being independent to even give him the time of day. Chivalry is far from dead, I see it in the young man who opens the door for me or the dope boy who addresses his grandmother with a "yes ma'am." I see it being revived in the man who wears tailored slacks and a blazer, and I see it the mail man who sends his woman roses just because. Times have changed, so the appearance of the gentleman has changed as well, I just wonder will we as "Independent Black Women" be so focused on doing us and getting our own to see that...